Home / 2006 / 2006 TAPE 8 - Youth, Parents and HIV - Bongisisa Maqungo
2006 TAPE 8 - Youth, Parents and HIV -
Bongisisa Maqungo
Bongisisa Maqungo talks to us about having an HIV positive parent, he discusses his mother disclosing her status to him and how it has affected him and how he deals with her status. Bongi's friends talk about how they can support Bongi and how being HIV positive is not something to discriminate against.
Mike: I just want you to tell me your name, age and when did your mother tell you she HIV positive.
Bongi: [My name is Bongisisa I go to Cape Town High School and I'm turning 14 on the 28th of February this year. I stay in Bellville.] {isiXhosa}
Mike: Tell me when did your mother tell you that she was HIV positive tell me that and how old were you?
Bongi: [I was 10 when my mother told me that she's HIV positive. It was in the year 2000 and I was doing Std 2.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: And how did you respond to that news when she told me, what did you feel?
Bongi: [When she told me I cried because I had heard that people who have AIDS die. So I thought that my mother would also die and I will be left without a mother. But she explained to me that she's still going to be alive, she's still go to live for a long time. And that with enough support from me and the people close to her, she will live for a long time, so I shouldn't worry.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: Another thing about Busi, she a public figure, she on the television so lots of people are seeing out there that she is HIV positive, how do you feel about that, do you ever get responses from friends when they see that, has it ever happened?
Bongi: [My mother appears on an HIV programme on TV. At first I couldn't understand why, but the older I grow the more I understand. Some people don't make fun of my mother being HIV positive. It makes me happy because she teaches other people to empower themselves in the fight against HIV.] {IsiXhosa}
Bongi: [One day they asked at school if we knew of any HIV support groups in town. I looked at him and saw that he was serious and wouldn't discriminate if I told him about my mother. Instead he would support me and my mother about her HIV positive status. I thought I should tell him and I told that my mother is also HIV positive. He asked me if I knew of a place where they make those brochures out of beads. I told him that my mother makes them.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: Okay now do you hide it, do you keep it quite sometimes that your mom is positive?
Bongi: [Sometimes I don't say that my mother is HIV positive but I do try and bring up a topic about HIV when I'm with my friends. But in the middle of that, they just change the subject and we talk about something else.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: Why did you choose him to tell him?
Bongi: [Because he was looking for a nearest HIV support group, I decided to tell him.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: Now let's talk to him, Sanele, tell me how did you respond when Bongi told you this?
Sanele: [When Bongi told me that his mother is HIV positive, I was shocked but I didn't show him that I was shocked. I kept the shock inside me. I told myself that Bongi's mother is HIV positive, I wanted to see how HIV positive people live their lives. I started watching Siyayinqoba Beat It! and I saw that Bongi's mother was living a full, healthy life - just like other people. I then realized that we should just appreciate people living with HIV for who they are. That's how I reacted towards Bongi and his mother's situation.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: As I understood you have been involved in the AIDS support group TAC do you know about HIV already, what do you know?
Sanele: [I don't know much about HIV, but when I asked Bongi about an HIV support group, I wanted to join an AIDS support group because I would also like to do my bit in the fight against HIV/AIDS. I just asked him for the closest support groups that I could go to after school. Up to now I haven't found a support group, but I was recently a member of an acting crime fighting group.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: Do you know anybody who is HIV positive, a friend, family or somebody do you know anybody?
Sandile: [I don't have any HIV positive relatives anymore. The only people I knew of were my aunt and my cousin. But they both passed away in 2003. My cousin was about 16 years old and my aunt was over 30. At the moment I don't have any people close to me that are HIV positive, unless I don't know their status.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: Do you hear people at school; do people at school say negative things about HIV positive or AIDS and what are the types of things they say?
Bongi: [Actually, they don't say bad things except for that if they were diagnosed HIV positive they would sleep around and infect other people so that they don't die alone. That is one of the things I hear among school kids.] {IsiXhosa}
Sandile: [I think that people try their best to handle the HIV issue discretely. Some people don't say bad things about HIV positive people because they don't know if the person sitting next to them is HIV positive or not. So if I say bad things, they might get hurt. Maybe I said a bad thing to my best friend, and he ends up getting hurt. So people are aware that the person they are saying bad things about might be sitting next to them, and they could lose someone they love because of that. I think that people do contribute their bit into the fight against HIV and the discrimination against people living with HIV.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: What is your response that Bongi's mother is positive, what is your response? Did you know it before or is it only now, how do you feel about that? What is your response?
Bongi's friend 1: [I didn't know about this, I'm hearing it now for the first time. But we will support our friend at school and with other things.] {IsiXhosa}
Bongi's friend 2: [My response to Bongi's mother being HIV positive; I think that a lot of people have HIV and we can't hide it anymore, it's part of our everyday life. I do feel for Bongi for how he feels, especially when he first found out that his mother is HIV positive. I do feel for my friend and I will support him.] {IsiXhosa}
Bongi's friend 3: [I didn't know that Bongi's mother is HIV positive, when he told me I was also shocked but I didn't show him that. He's a friend and he's always been, so we will support him.] {IsiXhosa}
Bongi's friend 4: [I didn't know that Bongi's mother is HIV positive, I just heard it now. And I empathize with him through his mother's status. I didn't know before, I know now and I'm willing to support Bongi and be by his side all the time.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: Do you know anybody who is HIV positive?
The boys: No
Sandile: Like I said, you don't know if the person next to you is HIV positive. You can't go around saying you hate HIV positive people or that you don't hang around HIV positive people because they will infect you. You never know if the person next to you is HIV positive so you can't identify an HIV positive or negative person.
Mike: Okay I want to ask you know how old are you, are any of you boys having sex?
Bongi: Yes, I am engaging in sex, but my last sex round was last year.
Sanele: [I do engage in sexual activities but the people around me are always encouraging me to use a condom. Though I don't know about any HIV positive member of my family, they are always warning me about the dangers of HIV. Most importantly, that teenage pregnancy does exist. I wouldn't like to have a child at my age because I can't support that child. I would have to quit school or my child will suffer if I don't.] {IsiXhosa}
Sandile: [We don't get condoms at school, but because we are sexually active we have our ways of accessing condoms.] {IsiXhosa}
Mike: What kind of education are you given at school, are you given AIDS education, do they teach you about HIV, about condoms?
Sandile: [They do provide AIDS education at school through Life Orientation. Life Orientation is there to teach us about things that affect human life; HIV and other diseases that can infect the human body. At school, they do teach us about HIV through LO - Life Orientation.] {IsiXhosa}
Bongi's friend: They do teach us about HIV; how to protect ourselves from being infected, and how to treat ourselves if we get infected, what sort of lifestyle we would have to live if we have HIV. So basically, we get the main education that we need to protect ourselves from the virus.
